“Just the Two of Us”

Like many others suffering from morbid obesity, the decision to choose a treatment option can be a difficult one. Much research, thought and emotion are put into this process. During this difficult time many spouses, loved ones or friends look to one another for advice and support regarding treatment choices. But, what if the one looked to for support was also searching for a morbid obesity treatment option?

Let’s journey back to November 2002. Jim Fivecoat eagerly searched the Internet and read many books looking for information on bariatric surgery. At the time, Jim weighed more than 300 pounds. The long days and nights of back aches, sore knees, blood pressure medications and cholesterol medications had finally caught up with him. He knew he had to do something quick.

“I tried everything. You name it and I tried it. The diets never worked and if they did it was only temporary. The only thing left to try was surgery,” said Jim. Jim’s feelings of disgust and aggravation with dieting are not uncommon among those suffering from morbid obesity.

Wanting to discuss the option of surgery with his wife Karen, in January 2003 he approached her about the topic. To Jim’s surprise, Karen was also researching the topic extensively, but not for him, for herself.

Karen was also morbidly obese and weighed 305 pounds. It was on a trip to St. Thomas that Karen was not able to get up out of a seat. This moment was a true realization for Karen. She knew she too had to do something soon.

“I started to talk to Karen about the surgery, and right then I knew she had been researching it too. We actually started to laugh about it. We found it ironic, but we both knew it was time to do something,” said Jim.

Eating was a recreation for Karen and Jim. Every time the family was together they ate a feast. This behavior led them to realize they were putting their bodies through a tremendous amount of unneeded stress.

Making a bold and brave move, Karen decided to have the surgery first. “I was a little nervous, but I knew I had to have it. I tried every diet on the market,” said Karen.

Finding support through each other, Jim now felt comfortable having the surgery as well. He saw how well Karen handled the surgery and felt it was time. Both Jim and Karen decided on the Roux-EN-Y procedure. “We were cautious about the other types. We knew a friend who ‘ate through’ the Lap-Band® (a common expression used to describe the drawback of the procedure) and we wanted to make sure the treatment option we chose would be one that would last,” said Jim.

As much as Jim and Karen prepared for the surgery, it was the after effects that seemed to leave the lasting impression with them. “A lot of people say that surgery is the easy way out. I can tell you personally that surgery is not the ‘easy way.’ Mind hunger is incredibly hard to overcome. You see the food, you want the food, but you’re not hungry. It takes a while to get past that,” said Karen.

“Our surgeries were very successful. We both were back at work shortly after and felt great,” said Jim.

Like many others who choose bariatric surgery and are successful with it, Karen and Jim also started to notice changes at work and even with friends. “Losing the weight helped my career. I feel that the obesity had actually stagnated my career. I saw a lot of changes in the way people treated me,” said Jim.

Agreeing completely, Karen stated, “Obesity is one of the last sanctioned prejudices. After the surgery, guys treated me differently and I even lost some friends. You have the friends that you would eat with and now that you had the surgery you can’t do that anymore. Sometimes they understand and sometimes you just have to do what’s best for you. We need a societal change in the acceptance of obesity. We need to realize that it is a disease and it needs to be treated as one too,” strongly said Karen.

Karen and Jim have been very successful with their weight-loss and are definitely enjoying all the benefits. Jim eliminated all of his co-morbidities by losing weight.

One specific area where Jim and Karen pay special attention to is the follow-up care for bariatric surgery.

“The follow up care can make all the difference. We find it extremely helpful and enjoy participating. This is not an easy thing to take on, and it never hurts to have support especially from someone who had the surgery themselves, in this case, my husband,” said Karen.

Today, Karen and Jim are enjoying themselves doing things they have not done in a very long time. For the first time in 30 years, Karen put a swimsuit on and Jim has taken up scuba diving, a sport once off limits due to his weight.

For a PDF version of this article, please click here.

To view Jim and Karen Fivecoat's before and after pictures, please click here.